Personal Meditation no. 184

“It’s not all in your mind but if you don’t control your mind, then the rest doesn’t matter.”

Embrace the Within

Fourteen days ago I was scared. And like anyone living in fear I just tried anything other than what I was currently doing in order to make a change and give myself a chance. It took a lot of those fourteen days to get myself aligned and get my mind and the rest of my body under control BUT it is possible. It is possible to live in alignment because I am living that life today.

It was a struggle for me to not return to the path that I had worn rough and wide over the years of being out of shape and looking down on the world. I thought I had it all figured out and I was in control of everything. BUT all it took was the idea of not being able to eat. All it took was the fear of not being able to provide for my family. All it took was reality to set in around me to have that entire narrative shatter. And I had to find a new narrative. I had to find something that worked.

So, I started with getting my body well. And that meant physical, mental, and spiritually well. So, I began doing a cardio routine every morning that has morphed into my daily workout. I began a mental workout that focused on writing on this computer every day and then morphed into posting on Embrace the Within. I began meditation and prayer and studying and reading with a focus on spirituality that then transformed into my reading of the entire Bible today. And I feel like I am in a better place because of that.

Sure, I still have moments of weakness when I think poorly of others, say poor things to others, and act poorly to others BUT I am working on the process and giving that to God to work with me on fixing and changing. I started out thinking I had all the power to make change and I was close to being correct. It took a lot more time to realize that all I have and all I will ever have is contingent on my work and God’s will. With those two things aligned, I have moved my operation of a few chickens and a garden box into a large greenhouse and several planters and chickens and rabbits. I am here doing what I need to do every day. And it was a struggle, it is a struggle, and it will continue to be a struggle. BUT so is life. Life is a mess, life is a struggle, BUT life is a joy when you do it in alignment. What we do here matters and a little goes a long way. I am testimony to those truths.

Where does this path lead? Only time and God can tell that BUT I look forward to the journey. I look forward to what the end of this growing season looks like. I look forward to the opportunity of growing so many more varieties of food this season. I look forward to the changes in my body, in my thoughts, in my life as I continue to grow healthier and more joyful about that change. I look forward to embracing all that is within me. I look forward to passing this knowledge on to my children and using this little life to do as many things as it possibly can. I look forward to all the abundance that I can attain through my journey with God on this walk.

It’s been quite a wild fourteen days for me. I learned and continue to learn a lot about myself. I continue to grow and change and build on the journey that started out of fear and turned that walk into one of hope and joy and abundance. I hope you find whatever you’re looking for and that journey brings you all the peace and joy and abundance you desire as well.

Have the day you want. I hope you find whatever you’re looking for.

#ThinkBetter #BeBetter #NoGodsNoMasters #MyBodyMyChoice #MakeYourselfGreatAgain #EmbracetheWithin