“For you fashioned my inmost being,
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I thank you because I am awesomely made,
wonderfully; your works are wonders —
I know this very well” (Tehillim (Psa) 139:13-14 CJB).
He created me and filled me with life and that makes me awesome and wonderful. Some folks do not feel awesome and wonderful despite the fact that we are made in His image, “So God created humankind in his own image; in the image of God he created him: male and female he created them” (B'resheet (Gen) 1:27 CJB). And sometimes because of the way we feel, we find it difficult to be comfortable around His people. If they are truly His people, then you will feel awesome and wonderful like He intends. Folks are not easy to love because sometimes we want to do His Work all alone.
Folks are always looking to change. Sometimes that change is to stand out. Sometimes that change is to fit in. Change takes many forms. When I started this journey over three years ago, I learned that some change takes courage. It took a lot of courage for me to stop conforming to the way of the Goyim and set myself apart and it led to a lot of relational problems during the plague years. I had to come to terms with the change that God was leading me into and through. There was a lot to deconstruct after years of deconstruction in the past. I carried a lot of baggage that needed to be laid at His feet and that took some time. BUT I never thought He couldn’t remake me because He already made me once.
Sometimes we feel like we do not deserve His love. And that can be problematic when our gifts are not the same as others around us, even in gatherings of Ekklesia. BUT in those gatherings of the called out we should definitely not all be the same sort of called out. As Paul points out to His letter to the struggling folks in Corinth, “Now there are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit gives them. Also there are different ways of serving, but it is the same Lord being served. And there are different modes of working, but it is the same God working them all in everyone. Moreover, to each person is given the particular manifestation of the Spirit that will be for the common good” (1 Corinthians (1 Co) 12:4-7 CJB). We are all parts even though we are together. We work together to bring out the righteousness of Him in each other. When that fails to happen, it is not His Spirit that has failed BUT our will that gets in the way of His Way.
I have grown up in and around many churches and watched way too many fall. And that happens when we take our eyes off His Plan and we start to make things in our own image. We set ourselves up for failure by doing things as the Goyim rather than following His Way. We give one person power and constantly get let down when that person falls. Jesus set His disciples out in pairs and had them work in collaboration with Him. He worked alone BUT we can not. We need each other. We all serve together differently for His good. A finger, a liver, or even a brain on its own is not going to get the job of being a human done. And a person here and a person there is not going to get His work done either. We need the rest of the Ekklesia to form a functioning body aligned in His Spirit to accomplish His Way.
Once He has remade us, our work is not done. Once we love ourselves as He loved us, we can then begin to love each other as He loves us. And that might take some time and effort on His part and on our part. BUT He is willing to do the work. I must be willing to do the work as well. And that work is made even better in gathering with others that are called out as well. We work much better together than we ever could alone. And though I am not much of a team player, God has worked on me with that in my walk with Him. If you let Him, He can work on that with you as well. Some folks are not easy to love because we want to do all His work on our own.
Grace and Shalom to your home.
I love you. I forgive you. Have a blessed and abundant day!