“And he said to them all, ‘If anyone wants to come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross every day and follow me.’”
Luke 9:23 AMP
I sure hope God likes me. I know that He loves me, BUT sometimes, I wonder if He likes who I am today. Obedience is important in my walk and it is so abundantly clear how little of me needs to be involved in that walk for it to work out for the greater good. I made the mistake of noticing some self in another person and calling that out. That doesn’t go well with folks that are self involved. Those kinds of folks do not need to hear that they might need redirection in their heart. I know that all too well because I was once one of those folks. And, honestly, I think all of us are not too happy about being shaped by God into what He wants because it involves a lot of change.
When I started this journey three years ago, one of my main quotes that I constantly came back to was, “Courage is choosing to change.” And that is no less true today than it was three years ago for me and my walk. A lot of who I became was making changes that I didn’t want to make. It was making changes that I had become all too comfortable with keeping as part of my life until I died. So, I had to die to those things. I had to totally become a new person every time I changed one of those habits that I had grafted into my life. I had to hack those pieces off and hack at the roots of what I had become. I had to really change who I was at the core before I could let those changes occur. And it is not an easy thing to give up what was your life.
Sometimes there is resentment that comes from God choosing you to walk this path. I know I have been there. I started questioning why God would lead me this way to only take away all that was me. I wanted to cling to those things a lot more than I wanted to be something new. And that is just the imperfection that lies within me that God needed to work out. I needed obedience to Him BUT I also needed to trust Him. I had to trust what He was doing more than I loved what I was.
And I think that is an important part of where the Church comes into forming us as Christians. The Church is there to hold you back. The Church is there to hold me back as well. I need the Church to reign me in when I get too much in my self. I need the Church to put me back on the right track when I get off the rails. I need the Church to care for me when times get rough. I need the Church to help me grow in compassion and understanding and love and grace. I need the Church. You need the Church. Stop being selfish.
I pray that I keep moving forward in love for God. I pray that His Will be done in my life. I pray that through Him I become a better Ambassador, a better human, and a better servant. I pray that God not only loves me BUT also likes who I am.
I love you. I forgive you. Have a blessed and abundant day!